I love that things are going swimmingly so far. Please continue to blog about the process. You do realize we’re all interested for our own selfish reasons.

I’m so happy that things went well with the Ex. I can’t imagine telling my ex that news… but hopefully one day!

Congrats girl. And thank YOU for always being in my corner too.

Well, I got back from lunch a short while ago and it went well. I didn’t think it would go badly, but I’m reminded over and over how lucky I am in all of this, especially after reading about many other single parents’ experiences. I know many don’t have involved parenting partners — or maybe those who are more involved than they’d like!

As to your questions, SMS, J. and The Ex haven’t met yet. They will at some point, of course, and while Ex appreciated J’s offer to meet right away to allay any concerns, he (Ex) didn’t think that was necessary.

What I reiterated today (and this is the truth) is that J. isn’t looking to take anything away from The Ex; he wants to develop his own relationship with T-Rex and Drama Girl. He’s also let the kids set the pace with him. In fact, he told me he doesn’t think relationships work if you try to force something; he’d rather let it evolve as it’s meant to be over time.

J. first met the kids in a group setting a month after we started dating. I didn’t really plan to do it that soon, but the opportunity presented itself when my sister and her family were visiting, and I thought I could do it in a way that protected everyone (myself included, seeing that I had positive vibes about us but it was too soon to tell anything). To be honest, I don’t think the kids even remember he was there that night. We went to a Japanese steakhouse and the kids were busy catching up with their equally-exicted/crazed cousins and watching the chef light food on fire!

The kids have reacted positively so far about the marriage. I waited until only a few months ago to tell the kids we were even “boyfriend and girlfriend” [insert eye roll and gagging sound from my son] — and only then because I knew we were serious and talking about the next step. The last thing I wanted to have happen was for me to announce we were engaged when they only thought this guy was a friend who came over once in a while.

After I told them about J. asking me to marry him and me saying yes, T-Rex first said, “So, J. is going to be a part of our family?” DG’s first response was: “I GET TO BE A FLOWER GIRL!!!!!!” (I explained,”maybe even a jr. bridesmaid!”) They both asked questions about the event, and then I thought I better make sure they knew that this meant J. was going to live with us after the wedding, and at some point we would move to a new house. It’s a lot to go through, so I tried to keep it simple and not overload them with details. DG asked if they’d still get to go to their Dad’s like they do now (yes) and a few other questions. I know more questions will come up over time, but so far so good.

Kudos to your Ex for realizing that he might have been projecting. And good for your for staying present, instead of reacting. You are all amazing role models.

I’m curious: Has J. met your Ex?

For my own selfish reasons, I’m also dying to know more about J.’s relationships with your kids.

How long did you wait before introducing him to the kids?

How are your kids feeling about your marriage?

So thrilled for you!! xo

Good for all!