Finding my space again
I drafted this a while ago, but for some reason it seems fitting (to me) to share on Valentine’s Day.
One of the hardest things about getting married again, after several years of living on my own, was giving up my space. I’m talking all kinds of “space”: physical space, mental space, my-time-on-the-laptop space, putz-around-the-house-because-I just-feel-like-it, don’t-judge-me! space. And, yes, drawer space. Lots and lots of drawer space.
To this day I still bear (wear?) the scars of three years ago when I emptied out my drawers and reorganized my closets and life to make room for a man who owned ten times the number of clothing items, shoes and accessories than I did. Let’s just say his collection of navy and gray sweaters alone — divided into crew neck vs. v-neck, summer-weight vs. winter – could bury a person alive.
Joe* dresses well and has good taste. For this I was/am happy! For having a caring husband I was and still am very happy! Relegating my jeans to a dark corner of the closet to accommodate his love of Banana Republic and a t-shirt collection that dates back to the late 80′s? For that I was not happy. So not happy.
Then, one day last month Joe saw me reorganizing my dresser again and again, fretting about how I was going to fit the new sweaters I’d received as Christmas gifts into my sad little allotment of drawer space. “Susie**, here’s what I’m going to do for you. I’m going to move my patterned sweaters*** to the closet and you can use this drawer here.”
I was stunned!
In fact, I must have seemed so happy that he then gave up another full-size drawer, moving his heavier-knit sweaters*** to the closet. It was an act of true love and understanding of just how much I needed my space back.
For that, I was and still am very, VERY happy.
*Seems silly using just “J” when his real name only has 3 letters. Maybe I’ll come up with a better stage name someday?
**Speaking of silly, I begged my parents to stop calling me Susie when I was around 11. Little did I know that one day I would once again readily answer to it!
***Yes, you read that right. I told you he had a lot of sweaters.